Lately, I have made a conscious effort to really focus on what I can control, which is very little. When I feel myself slipping into that nasty pit where I feel like everything that defines me is falling apart,I have tried to stop and ask myself where I have control. This small gesture has been so incredibly liberating! It has also helped me deal more Christlike in moments of pain.
When you feel like your world is spirally out of control, take a moment to evaluate you. What can you control in the situation, that is where you should put your energy. If you truly apply this tool I know it will bring you so much peace! The nasty does not disappear, but it becomes so much more manageble. You will find so much power!
Actually applying this tool is a constant effort for me right now, but I know it works! The other day I was faced with someone bringing up the pain of my past in a very comedic way. For a moment I was very hurt, because he was right, I was different than everyone else in the room because of past experiences that still causes me pain. In that moment I made a choice about my control. I could not control how he publicly brought attention to my past, but I could control how I viewed his intentions behind the comment. I could also control how I reacted publicly to his comment, and how I let it effect me. This was huge for weak little me! So, in that moment, I convinced myself that he did not intent to hurt me. I also chose to accept my past and confront it publicly, and let it go inside me.
Now, I know that this sounds like common sense, but it has taken me a while to really realize. I'm sure I will fail to use this tool many times in my future, but right now it has been so amazing! I am so blessed!